If a stupid, catchy pop song is stuck in your head, or a stupid, catchy pop song is in constant rotation on your iPod, this site is for you.

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18 Songs to Blast at Full Volume
13 Tolerable Country Songs
13 Modern Christmas Songs
Summer 2010

June 1st, 2010 // 8 notes // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Fighter”

Hmmm… Holy crap… I forgot how weird this video was.

It’s like a musical goth version of “The Cell,” and it’s really freaking me out right now. This song performed really well commercially, but I have a feeling that this video wasn’t involved in selling anything except night-lights. I’m kinda scared to fall asleep now because I’m afraid that if I close my eyes, Xtina will be there with her scary black wig and giant push-pins.

And don’t even get me started on all the bugs at the end. I feel like I need a shower just looking at all the moths and butterflies. Ew. Nature.

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

April 19th, 2010 // 1 note // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Not Myself Tonight”

OK, so I’m super-way-behind in posting this, but give me a break — I’m just now getting back into the groove of things after my hiatus.

Anyway… On to the witty commentary: I love this song. But not the kind of oh-my-god-it’s-such-a-great-song-and-therefore-I-love-it kind of love. Rather, it’s the oh-my-god-I’m-so-glad-Christina-finally-released-a-new-song-and-therefore-I-love-it kind of love.

Are you following me so far?

Before this track was released, we kept hearing from Christina about how, omg, this new album is like so much different than anything I’ve ever done before. Super exciting and awesome, and it just makes you want to soil yourself in anticipation. Then she puts this out and, surprise, surprise, it sounds like “Dirrty 2.0” (which isn’t necessarily a bad thing). But if you’re going to talk about how indie-electro-pop your new sound is, you’d better release something (and soon) that demonstrates that new sound.

The fantastically wonderful re-imaginings on Xtina’s greatest hits CD (like “Genie 2.0” and “Beautiful (You Are What You Are)”) were a better indication of her supposed new sound, so we’ve come to expect great things. Thinking-Outside-the-Box kinds of things. So this catchy, sexy pop track is a massive disappointment, in that sense.

♥ | 72 plays

November 23rd, 2009 // 1 note // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “I Turn To You”

So many things about this video are so terribly, terribly, amazingly awful.

For starters, those creepy, ice-blue eyes of hers aren’t real, right? No one’s eyes are that blue (or that terrifying).

Second, why is she waving her arms around so much? No one needs to reach for the sky that often during one song, unless you’re Mariah Carey and your arms actually help you sing. Which might be the case with Xtina. Who knows?

Finally, WTF is up with the awful (and completely unrelated) sidestory of a girl getting in a car accident? This is neither relevant to the song nor interesting at all. I don’t care about this ugly girl and her clingy mom; I just want to see Christina sing the shit out of this ballad, thankyouverymuch. Cut the crap and get down to business!

The shots of Christina in the rain and Christina on a rooftop are the only parts of the video that matter.

September 30th, 2009 // 1 note // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Beautiful”

Oh my god! Two boys are kissing! Boycott Christina Aquilera!

Seriously, what’s the big deal?

Also… This was a great song until 1) it got overplayed, and 2) people started adopting it as their personal anthems. If I never see another MySpace profile of an ugly homo or lonely teen girl plastered with this song and its lyrics, I’ll die a happy man.

September 9th, 2009 // Notes // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Dirrty”

This song and video pretty much destroyed any semblance of innocence Christina had left after her first album. And I’m OK with that. Xtina was way more fun and exciting once she stopped being who her management was telling her to be (OK, so I might be a little biased after watching the recent E! special on Christina).

Anyway… This video is amazing because of how nasty it is. I mean, she’s not even a little bit attractive in her greased-up hair/body and ridiculously heavy eye makeup. But I’d totally sex her anyway, and I don’t like vag.

August 7th, 2009 // 3 notes // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Genie in a Bottle”

Aw, a song about not giving up your virginity. Yet the video… Well… It seems to me that Christina, with all her gyrating, flirting and wearing of revealing clothing, is just daring you (or the guy in the video) to take her viginity. I mean, come on… writhing around on the hood of a car? And how about that “rubbing” dance move when she sings “rub me the right way”? Love it!

If you love “Genie in a Bottle,” then you’ll probably also love Christina’s updated version from her greatest hits album: “Genie 2.0.” It’s delicious.

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

June 17th, 2009 // 2 notes // Comments

Christina Aguilera - “Genie 2.0”

I sure love me some old pop, but I also love awesome new remixes of old pop. Here’s Xtina’s new version of her first single, “Genie in a Bottle,” and it’s just as terribly fantastic as ever.

If I had to listen to an electo re-do of a shitacular 2000s-era pop song all day long, it would be this.

Plus, I just love it when artists cover their own songs.

♥ | 41 plays